The Quarterback Bangability Index

Though I’ve never really concerned myself with understanding the particulars of the game, I can honestly say I love to watch football.  I like the sounds of football: the curt shouts, the knocking about of helmets, the referee whistles, the stadium roars.  I like the stories of football: because there are so few games per team per season, every matchup has great potential for drama.  I like the psychology of football: the way an offense can be forced to pass when it wants to run, or run when it wants to pass; the suicidal expressions of kickers who’ve just missed a potentially game-winning field goal; the Roman-gladiator-victorious-style celebrations after sacks, interceptions, touchdowns.

But you know what I best about football, better than all these things combined?

The pure, unadulterated man-candy.

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New year, new you.

This post is dedicated to Derek Loh, friend, life coach, muse.

Oh hey 2012.  I’m so glad you’re here!  I know the Mayans have been talking shit about you for millennia and all, so I think it’s really cool you showed up to the party.  Some girls would just like, hide, you know?  But you can’t let the apocalypse keep you from living your best life, right?  Just like, you’re so brave.  You’re like, my best friend.  No like, really.  Like, my best.  Do you want some of this Ecstasy?

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